Touch ups...

(*˘︶˘*).｡.:*♡ 

Have I said how much I love this color? I'm madly in love.  Since I have gone condition-only my hair has been doing fantastic. The color has not faded and in the last two months I've only had to do a quick refresh with MP's vampire red mixed with my conditioner *once*. 

excuse the lack of make up

The roots are a little dark but not very noticeable, especially under direct light. Note to self; cream dye needs to be mixed in a bowl, not a bottle. Also, 20 volume developer is your friend. 

And here is a length check. I am mere inches from being able to be considered Classic Length. If I tilt my head back, I can feel the ends brush against the back of my thighs. Its pretty awesome. 

Excuse the post-dye mess

Retro Goodness

I am a huge fan of 'alternative' beauty. As I should be, since at my heart of shriveled up hearts, I am very much goth. A very special type of goth as dubbed by my best friend, 'posh goth'. I.e. I take the morose and morbid and turn it more 'mainstream' and that was due to habit; my loving mother refused to let me walk out the door in any shape or form that would cause embarrassment to her.  Don't worry, I still found ways to wear fishnets on my arms but my make up could not and would not be as dark as I wanted it to be.  The most I could get away with was skin a shade or two lighter (and boy, was I pale since I avoided the sun), nude lips and smoky eyes. Sometimes I rebelled and wore black eyeliner and chapstick on my lips but I always got in trouble.

Now, if I had the balls to dress more 1950s, I doubt mother would not have approved. After all, those were the golden days and she got to enjoy the late 50s and early 60s in her youth.

But, you know, I considered it too bright back then.

Here I am, thirty some odd years of age and I have found the love affair to the 50s look. Again. And this time, I can try it. My hair, after all, is much, much, much longer than it was in my teenage years. I can and will wear whatever the hell I want make up wise and clothes wise because, eff it, its my money.

My money. My life. My business.

Ah, but for a while I felt I had surpassed the perfect length for the pin-up hair. Slayer is past my tailbone... in another four inches I may be able to sit on him. Wet sets don't really work, pin curls only last for so long (believe me, I tried them last year for the Power of She shoot for the Dames for Dreams. )

So, why bother now?

Because as a Dame and a huge advocate of learning to empower myself, I also have something to prove to myself; I can and will do what will give me strength and if that means a little bit of blush and some fancy, shmancy hair so be it.

That and D4D also has collaborated with Pinups Against Bullying Inc. for their Washington chapter. (Yes, I totally jumped into that project as an admin with both feet!) I haven't touched much about my personal life in this blog but I was bullied as a kid. A lot. And I mean -- a lot.

We're talking adults imposing their sexuality on me (catcalling, groping, molesting), kids my age picking up on that (name calling, 'pranks', a gang of girls wanting to beat me up for standing up for myself for once), kids younger than me (monkey see, monkey do), family, strangers... The whole kit and caboodle. It was awful. I hated my life as a kid--- is it obvious why I wore my disdain for humanity on my sleeve?

The whole experience has left me with more baggage than I can carry and a nagging voice in the back of my head that makes me second guess everything.

I am tired of spending days in bed without the desire to get out (I timed it. One day in December I spent almost 20 hours in bed, hiding under the blankets in a cycle of crying, sleeping, web surfing and crying. Eventually I only got out of the bedroom to relieve myself.). I'm tired of not liking myself. I'm tired of being tired.

So, with that, I am going out of my way to do things that typically make me uncomfortable.

And one of those things? Stepping in front of the camera. Power of She marked the beginning of that trend (and boy did I!). I have since then I have modeled a few more times. Infrequently, but I have... and I am doing it again, this time for another project I am absolutely crazy about.

And......the dress code is 1950s pin up style.

-deep breaths-

So, today marks the first day of practice. I have until 8/13 to perfect a look for the PAB photo shoot.

I chose to try the victory rolls.

I cannot roll Slayer the way Iris does.  Slayer is simply too fucking long. I can *barely* reach the ends even by over-directing the hair in one direction. Curse my t-rex arms!

So I modified it.

I pulled the hair over as she does in the vide by over-directing. I reached as far as I could, pressed my fingers against the hair and wrapped the ends a few times until I had a section short enough to pin between my fingertips. I then gently tucked the ends as I pulled my fingers out, then rolled it to my scalp. Pin.

So far, so good. The shape, from looking downward is perfect. Face on? Victory curls ain't so victorious.

That's okay.

Practice makes perfect, I say!

PS: Curling the ends would certainly help.

My accidental love affair with cowash

I recently bit the bullet and decided to change my color up drastically. Since I was a kid, I have sworn mother nature made a mistake and I should have been born a red head. I have done a lot of things to achieve red locks and for the most part, I've been one shade of auburn or another since I was a little girl. It has never been bright enough, though. The sun can only do so much to give me the red I want. (I have natural, red highlights)

I have done sun in. I have done henna shampoos. I have done henna (love the stuff but application is a struggle and the weight sucks. That was back when my hair was shoulder length. Now that Slayer is almost long enough to sit on, the idea of hennaing makes me cringe.). I have for the last few years settled with a dyp dye where I would bleach the ends and bangs then deposit red dye like n rage or manic panic.

And while Slayer can retain red pretty damn well, perhaps more so than the average hair, the it still bleeds.

I also felt like there was something missing, the ends were just not cutting it. 

So I grabbed four bottles of L'Oreal high lift red for brunettes. I always had issues with bleaching my own hair. While I was fine doing my bangs, I always panicked at doing the ends and I was NOT going to do the whole length. Nope. No sir. I didn't spend all these years growing out my mane and then lose it on a bad bleach job. 

As I rinsed out the dye and looked into the mirror, I couldn't help but whisper that I was back. Hah!

I had failed to prepare properly. I had gotten color-safe shampoo from Pantene and silly me, who should really know better, didn't read the ingredients. Nope.. too many sulfates. I've already had an issue with severe bleeding due to the deposit-only colors or the red turning orange extremely fast (N'Rage does that) because of sulfates. That's not even counting the fact that the only part I tend to concentrate shampoo on has been the scalp. The length gets the excess squeegied into it then rinsed out. 

I went out, bought what turned out to be fetid smelling, organic shea butter shampoo that was sulfate free. It gave me a TON of volume, but I had issues from the get go. My scalp flaked like no other, the hair felt filmy and dirty. Turns out, this 'hydrating' shampoo dryed the fuck out of my hair and the filmy feeling was not film but the cuticle of my hair wide open. No wonder it was always tangly, stringy and my scalp tried to recreate a snowglobe effect. I discovered this when I conditioned my ends in an attempt to make it not tangle so much (I stupidely had overcompensated with the shampoo and didn't use any conditioner. I figured since its shea-butter and oil infused shampoo, I shouldn't need conditioner. Right?) and I felt a difference. 

Still, Slayer suffered from dryness. 

Now, I have cut back on my routine a LOT. I don't deep condition as much. I pretty much have practiced 'benign neglect', i.e. style and forget it. 

So I'm sitting here in the middle of the night, frustrated with the dryness, angry at the flaking and suddenly, a big chop sounds like fun.

Oh, HELL NO! 

I look over and I see the green top of my vatika oil. Now, I had stopped using this a few years ago. Not because it sucked ass, but because I put it away and forgot all about it after the move. That and I was lazy. 

So I grab the bottle, run it under warm water to melt it a bit (If you're new or have never used coconut oil before, the oil solidifies. It may be summer, but this is Seattle and its still cold enough to keep the oil solid). I grab it, squeeze out some and realize its having a hard tiem coming out. I inspect the bottle and notice that the nozzle is clogged. -- Note, I'm lazy-- I decide to just squeeze harder. 

Big nope! 

I end up squirting about half the bottle all over myself and the couch. Immediately I scoop the majority of what I can back into the oil and then start mopping up the excess with my hair. I literally soaked Slayer in coconut oil to the point where I had to squeeze out the excess and dump it into the container. What I couldn't mop up was rubbed into my skin. 

When it came to taking it off, I knew it was going to be difficult. I debated grabbing the full strength shampoo when I remembered one of the LHC members explaining her method to co-washing and removing excess oil. She put it on dry, let it sit for about thirty minutes, then rinsed it off.  Now, I had tried cowashing before and failed miserably. 

I stared at the shampoo bottle... then the conditioner bottle, back to the shampoo bottle.

Eh, what the hell, why not? 

I grabbed the conditioner bottle and poured out two palm fulls, slapped it on the scalp. Grabbed another palm full, then squeegeed that shit to the length. Then I sat and took took a bath.

After half an hour I rinsed it out....but something happened... it felt lathery, not as much as the sulfate free shampoo, and definitely not as much as regular shampoo, but it lathered. Okay, I can deal with that.

Because it was conditioner, I found it easier to dig my fingers into the mass of hair and rub my fingers along the scalp. I was able to really get in there and rub,rub, rub unlike with the special shampoo.

And when I rinsed it all out, it came out super clean but not dry feeling.

I haven't used shampoo in about three weeks. Its summer time, Its warm. I'm working out and... my hair is still clean. Granted, it gets a little dirtier that way but that's okay. I can train my scalp to handle it just how I trained it to handle washing once a week. 

My scalp hasn't flaked. My color is still vibrant as fuck. Slayer doesn't tangle and it is absolutely silky. I thought he was soft before but this is amazing. 

It has been ages

And I have been one helluva busy bee.

Slayer is still long and I'm not quite sure if I intend to keep said length or not. I'm almost to classic but I am bored out of my gourd and desperately trying to keep my goals.  I've changed a few things to stay with this goal in mind, such as coloring the bangs but... that only makes me want to go red all the way and this means I'll have to snip-snip for the sake of making life easier for myself.

But that is neither here nor there.

That hobby of mine with the camera? Its turning serious. I can't help it. I love playing with my camera and now that I finally got my computer working properly, I can edit and keep going.  I cannot believe that I found myself completely booked out for May and June, let alone that I'll be doing this amazing project for the Dames. Cat and I will be photographing the Power of She series as well as our 2016 calendar.

I look back at some of the photography I did last year and I find myself amazed at the growth I've taken ... especially since I have not taken it as seriously as I am now.

I will be updating more in the next coming weeks. I'll be celebrating my birthday with doing a free photo shoot for the women of Bothell with Cat and other photographers. 

I am beyond excited. 

Review 2: Hands Down nail wraps

I will preface this by saying this may be a slightly unfair review as I had my nails shellacked almost a month and a half ago and the woman who did the job made it almost impossible to remove the damned thing.

Now, any of you who have gotten your nails done either professionally at a reputable salon (key word: reputable) or have DIY'd the gel polish in some fashion *know* that roughing up the nail is not necessary. Stripping the nail off all oils and dirt, however, is non negotionable.

Friend and I went to a little salon that while it was not completely 'cheap' it was still reasonably priced but still cheap in comparison to other salons. Now, I've had Shellac (tm) done before per the CND standards and while I *loved* that manicure, I was not fond of the price of $45 for just the manicure. Hell to the no. So I was thrilled to find gel polish at this particular, clean salon.

I asked her to not roughen up my nails because I've seen this done even for *nail polish*. I suppose it was the language barrier but she did it anyway. And I would not have been as upset over it if she'd used a regular nail file (which ladies at the other salon have done since my nails have a tendency to split and and peel so we sometimes have to file off a broken flake) she used a black block. If any of you have gotten your nails done with enhancements, you know that this black block is absolutely rough. Its horrible. It leaves grooves on the nails -- better for whatever type of enhancement to latch onto.

But my nails are thin enough as they are and I didn't want to do this step. They're also super dry. I honestly don't *need* this step at all. Gel manicures have  tendency to adhere to my nails super easy.

Ugh, it was brutal. I couldn't take off the damned thing completely.

A few weeks ago I bought my own lamp and gellish base and top coat. See, I love the way gel polish strengthens my nails and gives them that extra thickness they so need. (You can use a cuticule oil just fine with these and it hydrates the nail bed just fine). The intent was to do a gelly sandwich but I decided to just do the clear base and top coat then add regular polish on top with a simple top coat. I can remove the nail polish after a week and still have the base underneath to keep my nails strong.

I tried the foil method this time and it *WAS HORRIBLE*. I had to scrape, scrape, scrape the stupid thing off and I was still left with chunks of the stuff on the nail bed. I just added the clear stuff over it and called it a day.

So far, that base coat has lasted about two and a half weeks and the only place it started to chip was on the regrowth that had not been filed to death by the manicurist. Figures.

Foil method failed me again and I was experimenting with just teeny tiny bit of a cotton ball as I'd seen used at Reputable Salon (and Shellac's training videos). -- The other reason was that that was the last cotton ball I had.

So I went off to sally's, originally looking for the Orly Glitter and soak off gel envelopes but they were sold out. Instead, I picked up the HandsDown wraps.

They come with a thick cotton pad glued to self-adhering ace-bandage type material.  They're about the height of a standard bandaid.

The instructions say:

Saturate pad with acetone. Hold pad on nail. Wrap tightly around finger and press to seal end.

How badly could I fuck this up?

Pretty bad.

Wrap one: I overloaded the pad with acetone. Wrap would not adhere on itself. I tried to fix it by tying a clear elastic over it. (DAMN IT, I knew I forgot to pick up something!)

 I ended up cutting the circulation off my finger. 

Wrap two: couldn't get the 'end' to seal and that's because I misread the instructions and wanted to seal the actual tip to keep the acetone from evaporating at the tips.

Wrap three: finally got the damned placement right but I still wrapped it too tight and pinky started turning purple.

I managed to do okay with the other fingers until I got to the other hand and I just kept floundering by making them too loose.

Results:

The gel that had been applied to the regrowth that was not roughened up came off superbly easy, as expected. The rest had to be scraped off again, though it was removed a little easier. I managed to get more of the purple glitter off. Its still visible in one thumb and part of forefinger.

I had one hellufa time at the tips though. I suppose part of it is due to the heavy filing but the other part is due to the fact that the tips are open on this so I did notice that the acetone evaporated rather quickly on the overhang.

Good thing I went with two packs of  ten wraps each for about four bucks.

I give this product 4 out of five stars.

I am sure this would have been a total winner if the tip was encapsulated in the wrap.

ion Anti-Frizz Solutions leave-in-conditioner review

The LAST time I dyed the ends of my hair I also renewed my Sally's card and as I was talking to the cashier she told me I had earned a freebie of something on the counter. I typically don't pay attention to this section as it usually full of product I don't use, chiefly because of silicone as it weighs my hair down too much.

In this section, though, it did notice this leave-in-conditioner from ion. Now I've been using ion color for about a year now and while I can't say I'm super pleased with their bright's line in terms of longevity, I like the way my hair feels after. 

So I picked it up because it was free and I wasn't too sure but I thought I read somewhere that amodimthicone is one of the nicer silicones. 

I didn't try it for another month or so.  I tried it on, it felt amazing and then hand damage.  

It wasn't until recently that I started using it again when one of the girls from LHC reminded me of a curly method I'd taken last winter and modified for my non-curly hair. (The method is LOC, Leave in Oil Cream)

However, I was STILL worried (though not too much since it is on a leave in and such products tend to be rather light) about the amodimethicone so I decided to dig up some info and I did this on the LHC boards by looking up Luxe Piggy's info because she is the Queen of Cone and knows her stuff. Like, she knows the first-hand what silicones can do and the science behind it. I respect and bow down to the fountain of knowledge that she is. 

So I found it

LuxePiggy : Amodimethicone is my favourite cone of all! \(^(oo)^)/

Unlike other types of silicone, amodimethicone carries a positive charge, which results in targeted conditioning of damaged areas and the formation of a shine-enhancing nanostructure (ETA:Formation of nanostructure on hair surface, Journal of Cosmetic Science). Once deposited, the positive charge helps repel further deposition, so amodimethicone does not build up on the hair.

I've tried a few other leave in conditioners but have not been that great. My favorite have been the Johnson & Johnson no tear leave in an detangler but that stuff isn't very cheap. The bottle may look big but its only because its wide.

I was given a sample of Big Sexy Hair leave in and that smelled *amazing* and did a fantastic job but it was waaaay too expensive.

ion's stuff smells almost the same as the Big Sexy Hair leave in, works just as well and its cheap. A large 12fl (355mL for any non-US readers) is about $5-$6 and with my discount its about $4 and some change.  Not bad and I may end up picking up another bottle when I'm done... though honestly, I probably won't. I have been making my own leave in for a while and that just comes out to be like $0.05 to make. I just now have a bigger bottle to use.. 'cause its a pain in the rear to fill up the travel BSH bottle with my own concoction every week.

On to the method I've been doing, LOD:



1) On damp hair, apply a Leave in conditioner.
2) Add Oil of choice to the length.
3) let air Dry or blow dry on low.

My ends still feel super silky, like I did when I cut it weeks ago.

New cut and Color!

I'm sick. I'm miserable and I should be going to bed right now BUT... I just finished my sleep braid which reminded me to share what I just accomplished.

About two months ago, I did my bi-annual trim and not too long after that I felt my hair feel like straw. I thought it was just dry and had planned to do some more maintenance when I fell down and sprained my wrist a few weeks after the trim, ruining my plan. And good thing too!

the ends kept feeling dryer and dryer. I finally stopped to look and I saw an ABUNDANCE of splits, which angered me. WHY!? Why was I having such problems when I do my best to care for Slayer without being a little too crazy and over the top.

Turns out Manthing, my beloved husband, had been using my hair scissors on paper.

Which irritated me because scissors are not cheap. Mine were cheapish but still not cheap. So I decided to pay to have them sharpened and realized the fee is MORE expensive than my pair of scissors. They were like, $25... which is a lot for my cheap little heart.

After months of hemming and hawing, I finally spent the $150 on a Kamisori student kit. It was a *steal*, considering that one of their regular shears is upwards of $400 or more... so much so you can actually *finance* a damned pair.

It was $150 and it came with a razor. Good for cleaning up and shaping men's hair-- razors don't touch Slayer. My hair is way too long and my goals too extreme for me to use razors. I'll explain more on that in a different blog entry, I promise. Its too lengthy and I'm falling asleep.

I gave myself a cut. A legit cut. Long layers, length, bangs. I even thinned in some places.

And if that wasn't enough, my cut came out so perfect I felt emblazoned, emboldened even! I bought bleach and did my OWN bleaching. I did an amazing balayage on my bangs  (the only place I actually would test such a thing since bangs get cut frequently anyway).  I added my red and BAM, gorgeous hair.

It came out so amazing a friend asked me to dye her hair. We did it all black with peekaboo red blayaged in around the crown and nape of the neck.

I wont' share her pictures without consent, but here are mine.

Do you like my beard, my sexy beard? I think I can place in contests!

I don't know why I keep thinking to go purple. Red's too amazing. 

Also, I love this dye. Its 'N Rage in Neon red. This lighting does not do it any justice. Its amazing. And the 'beard'? The last dye job on that was back in MAY.