50 Shades of Dirty part Deux

So I was standing there, last night, letting the warm water spill onto my body, fingertips wiggling away at my scalp to work it into a semi-lather (I do use low sulfates so not much sudsing goes on.) and it dawned on me; it took me almost 26 and a half  years to figure out HOW to properly wash my goddamned hair.

I almost got shampoo in my eyes.

Idiot.

Anyhow, I couldn't believe it. Twenty six and a half years to get this shit right? WHY!?

Because mother didn't know how to properly wash hair (Don't get me wrong, but mom's so OG she shampoos and conditions her hair EVERY day. Dad's even more hard core... mom has to hide the soap bars because he'll wash his hair with Irish Spring!). She couldn't really teach me and I learned most of what I knew from Herbal Essences commercials and Psycho(s) movies (Haven't you noticed how in 99% of horror movies the damsel in distress winds up in the shower and is washing her hair when some random haunt happens? Ever since Psycho, I swear...)

I'd glob the shampoo, slap into my scalp, scoop up the length and SCRUNCH. I'd also dig my nails into my scalp to 'get rid of the dandruff'.

Eventually I got smart and realized that the shampoo was drying the fuck out of my scalp, hence the scruffies.  So went on a no sulfate/low sulfate diet. That did wonders for the condition of my scalp. I got a talking to by a hair dresser two years ago and she told me I needed to condition more. So there was another lesson.

I watched a few youtube videos on styling and I came across this video from the beautiful Torrin :

This video covers the gist of what I do. But, it wasn't until I saw THIS video :

that it really sank home. 

Compared to the child's hair, mine is very, very, perhaps evenly pin-straight. But I do the same thing. I stick my fingers on the underside and gently rub. I give myself a good massage at the crown of the head, then slip my fingers to the area along the nape of my neck and continue. I then rinse off a bit, squish it along the length and rinse off before adding my glops of conditioner. 

Because I use TONS of conditioner. I pre condition, shampoo, then condition one last time. 

Man, I wish I had stumbled across these two videos a lot sooner. I love the idea of loose braids to keep the hair from tangling, especially when the child is old enough to do this herself. Its like... training wheels on a bike. 

Ah. Youtube. I adore your pain in the butt availability.